“We adore you O Christ and we bless you:”
“Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.”
The refrain trembled off my lips almost too easily. I didn’t even need to look at the booklet for the response. It’s been well over 20 years since I attended the Stations of the Cross; but on April 2, 2010, it was like it was only yesterday.
It was Good Friday and I was in the midst of the “Back In Church” Holy Week Marathon: Five Churches, One Week. It started with Palm Sunday at Bethany Evangelical Free Church on Madison’s Eastside. Then, the previous evening, I had taken in the meditative Maundy Thursday service at Glenwood Moravian Community Church in Madison’s Monroe Street neighborhood. Now, it was 6:30pm at Grace Episcopal Church on the Capitol Square in the heart of Downtown Madison.
Grace was a conflicted choice for my evening’s festivities. It’s close to where I live, but Grace was the first church I attended on my church smorgasbord (See my first posting in this blog.). So I wasn’t introducing myself to a new church. But my curiosity was intrigued by the opportunity to experience the Stations of the Cross outside the Roman Catholic setting.
From the time I was an itty-bitty Christian I’ve been intrigued by the Stations. If you asked me why back in my Christian hey-day, I would have said, “Because it makes me feel that much closer to Jesus when walking in his footsteps.” In third grade at St. Mary’s Catholic School, using markers and crayons, I created my own version of the “Way of the Cross.”
Growing up, I spent much of my life trying to live in Christ’s tortured footsteps. Striving to be closer to God, but always feeling a nagging sense of failure. No matter how many times I went to Confession, no matter how many communion wafers I ate, no matter how many prayers I recited, I was always foremost a Sinner. I could never be good enough or tortured enough for my religion to finally accept me as a good soul for heaven. Looking back on it, that’s what it was all about: Ending suffering in my life here on earth and making a place for my eternal life without suffering in heaven. Going through a ton of suffering to get rid of suffering. It looks paradoxical to me now.
If you are not familiar with the Stations of the Cross, here’s a quick run-down for you:
- The term “Stations of the Cross” refers to a series of 14 representations of events on Jesus’ journey from being condemned to death to his eventual death on a cross.
- In many churches, the “Stations” are identified by different plagues or signs in 14 different locations surrounding the interior of the church (or in some other significant location on the church grounds, such as a cemetery).
- The devotion of the Stations of the Cross includes passing before each “Station” in religious meditation and prayers on Jesus’ suffering.
- To see all 14 Stations in dramatic marker and crayon, please visit my third grade project at this link. Go check it out now. This is your last chance!
In St. Mary’s Catholic Church, parishioners would alternate between standing and genuflecting in their pews, as the priest, flanked by altar boys holding candles and a large staff with a golden crucifix, would pass from Station to Station. The priest would state the Station and recite some prayers, including: “We adore you O Christ and we bless you.” And the congregation would recite, “Because by your holy cross you have redeemed the world.” Many a Good Friday, dressed in a black robe with a white vestment overlay, I walked the Stations as an altar boy carrying a candleholder or the large golden crucifix staff. The recitation burned indefinitely into my brain.
About 15 people had congregated at Grace Episcopal Church on Good Friday to walk the Stations of the Cross for Holy Week 2010. At first, we each took our places separate from each other in the pews, but the pastor quickly gathered us in back of the church. She informed us we would follow the Stations together as a group; each one of us would be given the opportunity to recite a Station’s prayers from our booklets.
This was different.
First, the “priest” or “pastor” was a “she.” She even wore the white-and-black collar and the fancy vestments. I was raised Catholic; to this day, women still don’t get to be “priests.” The closest a girl can get is to be a nun. Although Catholics are now much more open than when I grew up. St. Mary’s now has girl “altar boys” or “servers.”
Second, where were the altar boys or servers? Why doesn’t any church other than Catholics have servers? The closest I’ve seen is a young boy who lit candles at a United Church of Christ service. It was nice to see the church prepped for Christ’s death though. All crosses and crucifixes were draped in black fabric and the altar area was stripped to its barest essentials. Still, it would have been nice to have a couple servers around for pomp’s sake. Call me “old-fashioned.”
And third, we would move from Station to Station together and we would recite the prayers. As a Catholic, I’m used to a priest leading me, not me and my other sinner brethren. At this church we would be involved in the process, not just a spectator. We as a church community were an involved and integral part of the ritual.
So off we went. Unsure how this would turn out, and nervous about reading, I was quickly won over by this interpretation of the Stations of the Cross. From the accented prayers by Greek sisters who placed extra dramatic emphasis on the comparison of Jesus’ suffering to our own “retched states” to the nerve-racked college-age boy as he nervously stuttered through his reading to the beautifully African-inflected prayers from another woman to my own bland rendition of the Seventh Station, this wonderfully diverse and immersive version of the Stations of the Cross was as contemplative and enthralling as the Stations I grew up with.
This was what this “Back In Church” exercise is all about. To get away from what I’ve grown up with, to experience something new, to learn more about the different religious practices around me, and in doing so, to learn more about the people around me and in turn to learn more about myself.




